Acceptance, Realization and Repentance

Acceptance, Realization and Repentance

Sometimes when you get real bored and you start wondering about the events that occurred in your life. How sometimes these events bring you great happiness and joy other times bitterness and tears. When I look back at the things I did in the past, I recalled a quote that went

“I don’t regret my actions, but I feel its consequences”.

Anonymous

Yeah I guess that dude is right. Life is just too short to dwell on the past, but then again the past shapes the present and the latter forms the future one way or another.

I’ve been thinking about what I did in my own past. A stroll down memory lane if you will, stopping by a few corridors and visited a few memories I am fond of, avoiding those of the opposite.

Now, I’m a strong believer that everything happens for a reason. These occasions in my life, anybody’s life doesn’t happen by accident. It must have some meaning or purpose. It’s not my intention to sound like Agent Smith in the Matrix, but you have to agree to what I’ve said just now. Everything has a purpose. Everything.

I’ve experienced a lot of highs and lows in my short twenty years, most of them occurring in my late teens. I’m sure that I’ll go through much more, but right now I would like to focus on what I’ve been through.

Love is a wonderful gift is it not? It’s a funny kind of emotion. Unlike anger, frustration, pain or ambition, it gives no motivation that would allow us to succeed in this superficial world. It brings happiness, yes it’s true, but then again it brings us sadness like we never felt before. It is almost like we are dependent on it, like some recreational drug. Once you’ve tried it you’ll be hooked. Not only does your body crave for it, so do your mind and most importantly your soul. You can’t live without that person. You need that person to be with you. You need to know whether he or she is safe from the dangers of our cruel world. You want to touch that person. You want to smell that person. You want to taste that person. Last but not least you want that person to have those same desires for you.

Imagine what that could do to anyone. People are willing to literally kill for love. You may deny it, but when Cupid’s venomous arrow has pierced you and left its ugly wound you’ll jump on my bandwagon. Love is a powerful tool that can mould a person, in more ways than one.

I have always self-proclaimed myself as the Ultimate Player amongst friends. But that really is all in jest. Sure I have all the ‘knowledge’ I obtained while observing my other playa’ buddies turn on the charm to err… charm the girls into falling into their arms and those countless ‘research’ from FHM and Cleo combined, but what do I lack?

I’ll tell you what I lack. I lacked the courage to be rejected. Rejection and I don’t get along too well. I’m the sort of person who will stop at almost nothing to get what I want or die trying.

Remember what I said about purpose? I think being rejected too has a purpose in life. Let us see the pros and cons to this shall we?

Pros:

1) I learned not to go for a girl sole based on her body ….. I must also look at her face.

2) Sometimes its best to let some things go

3) Learned not to be too choosy (A friend told me this)

4) My wallet is still half filled

5) My weekends are my own

6) Answering to absolutely no one

7) Being single and loving it!

8) Learned not to reveal too much of myself to anyone

9) Became a little bit wiser

10) I get to flirt around with any girl I want, anytime, anywhere! Hahah!!

Cons:

1) A heart that’s grown colder

2) A personality that got meaner

3) A mind that has turned twisted and demented at times

4) The ability to not trust anyone

5) Envious to anybody who has that special someone

6) Plenty of latent anger

7) Bitterness

8) Unforgiving and merciless when encountering betrayal

9) Having a black hole within one’s soul which will stay there for a long time

10) Broken heart and the tendency to break the hearts of others.

Well I’ve listed the pros and cons. I don’t know if my view on getting rejected will be the same as yours, but to tell you the truth I don’t care.

I’ve not only accepted what rejection has done to me and to be honest, I appreciate it. One cannot survive in this cruel world without anger, ambition, and a sick mind.

Till then, have a nice life.